Marilyn Manson Out There Flicking Reporter’s Balls

In an interview with The Guardian, Marilyn Manson mulls over a multitude of topics such as the mass school shooting at Columbine where he says it “destroyed my career” because people blamed him for turning the teens into killers. Not only did Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold kill 15 kids, but, more importantly, they also killed his album sales.

“Give them the money and let them make their own choice: guns or records. If [the Columbine killers] had just bought my records, they would be better off. Certain people blame me for the shootings at schools – I think my numbers are low, and hopefully they go up on this record.”

Of course, all this was after Manson started the interview by hiding behind a door and pointing a fake gun at the interviewer’s neck when he walked in. But not before he flicked the reporter’s testicles as some sort of Edison light bulb moment.

This comes as quite a surprise: I have encountered a lot of unusual things as a journalist, but have thus far managed to get by without an interviewee touching my genitals. More surprising still is that leaning over and flicking my testicles appears to form part of his answer to a question about whether he has ever felt consumed by the character he created a quarter of a century ago, in the same way that Bowie struggled to separate himself from Ziggy Stardust or the Thin White Duke. Certainly, the way he says: “That’s the difference!” immediately afterwards suggests it is, but I’m not sure.

Oh, this guy has never been flicked in the testicles during an interview before? Look at Mr. Fancy Pants over here. I’ll have you know that I require my interviewees flick my nut sack at least once during an interview. It’s a great way to build rapport… and to get a boner.