Kid Rock Trolled Everyone With Senate Run, Just Wants You to Buy His Album

WE DID IT, AMERICA! I don’t know what we did or how we did it, but we have successfully convinced Kid Rock to not run for Senate.

Here’s what Kid Rock told Howard Stern:

“Fuck no, I’m not running for Senate. Are you kidding me? Who couldn’t figure that out? I’m releasing a new album. I’m going on tour, too. Are you fucking shitting me?”

So, it appears that Kid Rock campaigning and teasing us of a possible Senate run was just…to promote his album? I don’t know why he set up a website, made a bunch of speeches about the right and the left and the flag, and wrote letters declaring his love for black people, but it sounds like he was just trying to promote his album.

This album is going to suck.

I have two theories.

First, is that Rock really did all of this to drum up interest for his brand. Not necessarily his album, just himself. No one has heard a Kid Rock song on the radio since he ruined “Sweet Home Alabama” and his last three albums have failed to hit number one. He needed to do something to get his name back in the spotlight, and since politics are the thing to do if you’re a celebrity, that’s the route he went. It worked. We talked about him, he went on radio shows, dropped a plug for his album at the end, and kept his name out there before announcing that it was all a joke.

My second theory is that someone told him, “You’re embarrassing yourself. Knock it the fuck off” and he actually listened to that advice.

Yeah, it’s definitely the first reason.

Anyway, you’ve successfully dodged the Kid Rock bullet, Detroit. Now go buy his album so he doesn’t pull this nonsense again.

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