‘Jersey Shore’ Coming Back Because We Have Forgotten Pain

The entire original cast of Jersey Shore minus Sammi have decided to reunite for at least one more season in order to leave a new bitter taste of disgust in your mouth after you finally washed out the old one. This time it’s a family vacation. The title, of course, is pretty nuanced: Jersey Shore Family Vacation.

MTV aired a teaser during Floribama Shore. Note that I have no idea what that is. I assume it follows the adventures of Florida Man.

For those wondering, Sammi isn’t coming back because she can’t stand to be near Ronnie. You probably don’t even recognize those names so don’t worry about it.

Those too young to remember Jersey Shore, I really can’t explain it to you since I didn’t watch it. All I remember are tales of the trash bag full of Jell-O character called Snooki and DJ Pauly D who’s hair was as guido as his spray tan. Oh and who can forget Brad Ferro aka the guy who punched Snooki in the face.

Yea, that’s not going to fly in 2017.

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