ESC

Bill Gates Is Still the Best Secret Santa

Every year, Reddit runs a secret Santa gift exchange among users who sign up for it. It’s a special time of the year where everyone on pretty much any specialty board has to answer questions from people who have no idea what to get someone who plays Magic: The Gathering or reads One Piece or whatever. And every year Bill Gates participates and goes way over the $20 recommended price of the gifts.

We last reported on Bill Gates’ gift-giving in 2013 when he sent a woman a stuffed cow, a National Geographic travel book and made a donation to the Heifer Project, a charity which buys dairy cows for poor farmers. A pretty nice gift, all things considered.

Since then, however, Bill has gone a little overboard on the whole gift thing, and his presents to Redditors have become more elaborate. This year, Redditor VietteLLC met the delivery guy at her door to receive a ginormous box, which she described as being so large “I could fit about 5 of me in the box.”

The main thing in the box was a 30 pound Pusheen plushie that’s bigger than she is. It is huge and adorable, much like me. Ladies. But Bill Gates doesn’t stop with an impractically huge stuffed cat like he’s Kaz Hirari or Tim Cook, oh no. Gates also donated $750 to no-kill cat shelters, announced on hand-drawn gift cards, which is a super nice touch. Oh, and a whole bunch of other stuff I’ll let her explain in her own words.

A Stormy stuffed animal (Pusheen’s sister) • A tiny Pusheen Ornament • A book on cat shelters with a sweet note inside he wrote • A business book (I make and sell startups) • Silly Dr.Who book for my coffee table • Dr.Who cardboard Tardis for the cats LOL! • A $150 Gift card to True Grit <— super selfless, as it was intended to get downloads for Procreate, which is only on iPads. Nice touch, Bill ;) ..I’ll stop calling you that, just give me a day. • A miniature Austrian snow-globe with a teeny tiny white kitten inside. Stunningly beautiful craftsmanship. • A commissioned, one-of-a-kind cross-stitch of Me and my pal, Bill, and my 4 cats that says “Live Life in the Meow” .. harr harr. LOL! I cracked up at him wearing a little mask to be secretive ;) – nice touch! Even the frame was wonderful so I don’t have to wait to hang it up! • A Japanese Daruma with a very sweet message attached to it (sorry Reddit, I’LL NEVER TELL! it’s a secret! muahaha) • Dave Matthews Band shirt (with an appropriate quote on it) • Dave Matthews Band Car Sticker (I actually really wanted that lol) • Scroll of the map of Skyrim lol – pretty well made actually!

Imagine being this woman’s significant other, now you’ve got to compete with Bill Gates at Christmas. That normal-sized stuffed cat just isn’t going to cut it anymore, is it? Although that probably isn’t a problem, as your odds of being in a relationship decrease precipitously for every cat you have over two. But I don’t want to be mean, VietteLLC does seem like she’s pretty awesome.

The best part? Well, second to the donations and gigantic Pusheen.

Knowing that at some point during my workweek, I was drinking coffee, writing a boring email, and Bill Gates was somewhere having a professional photo taken with a jumbo Pusheen and writing me notes about cats.

That is a pretty great thought. Bill Gates is certainly an interesting guy, and for someone to be as rich as he is and not make half the country want to build a guillotine with his name on it is an accomplishment in and of itself. Jeff Bezos might want to take notes.

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