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‘The Emoji Movie’ Was So Bad It Ended Jordan Peele’s Acting Career… and He Wasn’t Even in It

Jordan Peele doesn’t want to act anymore. It makes sense, now that Dave Chappelle is back and doing specials on Netflix, there really isn’t a need to have Peele or Amy Shumer fill in for him anymore. I kid, of course. But we all noticed that Key & Peele, Mind of Mencia, Inside Amy Schumer and Important Things with Dimitri Martin were all just Chappelle’s Show without Chappelle before Dave mentioned it in one of his new specials, right?

Anyway, Jordan Peele isn’t going to Africa, he’s just going to direct. He had a big hit with Get Out and there’s no denying that he’s funny and exceptionally talented. But why quit acting? I mean, Keegan-Michael Key is everywhere. Seriously. I’ve seen Key on more than one show on the same night. They should consider him to play Jamie Madrox, because I’m sure there’s more than one of him. Turns out Peele is quitting acting because of The Emoji Movie.

Vanity Fair covered the Directors Guild Awards, where Peele won the award for best first-time director, because Get Out was just out this past year, even though it seems like it was forever ago, which is why there’s two dozen Holocaust movies that get one-week engagements on four screens in December, just before awards season, every year. In his acceptance speech, Peele explained why he was going to stop acting.

“The Emoji Movie actually helped me quit acting,” Peele confessed at the podium. “I was offered the role of Poop.”

He paused to assure the audience inside the Beverly Hilton ballroom, “This is true. I would not make this up.”

When Peele’s manager told him about the offer, Peele responded, “That’s fucked up.” Then, after a beat, “I’m going to sleep on it.”

The next day, Peele said he called his manager back to see, just out of curiosity, what the studio was offering to pay him. But Peele’s window for the degrading opportunity had already closed.

“[My manager said], ‘They’ve already given it to Sir Patrick Stewart.’ I was like, ‘Fuck this.’”

Peele should have known not to sleep on the offer of Poop in The Emoji Movie, a cursory reading of the script would tell you it’s the title character.

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