DMX Gonna Make Judge in Tax Evasion Case Lose His Mind Up in Here, Up in Here

Stop. Drop. Shut ’em down, open up shop. Oh. No. That’s how DMX lawyers roll.

Rapper DMX skipped out on his taxes for five years and now he’s about to pay a hefty price. He pleaded guilty to evasion of $1.7 million in taxes and is awaiting sentencing.

But don’t worry, X Heads, the rapper’s lawyers have a plan. According to court documents that were released, the lawyers plan on playing the greatest hits of DMX in order to sway the judges.

X gonna give it to ya. The “it” in this case is a lighter sentencing.

Murray Richman, X’s lawyer, wants the judge to “understand (DMX) in his genuine voice.” Here’s what else he had to say:

“It is raw Earl. We are not here or desirous of molding him into what some may want to see; Earl is uniquely him and that is both his beauty of mind and his genius.”

The two songs that will be thumping in the court room are “Slippin'” and “The Convo.” Nothing explains the heartaches of not paying your taxes like, “I’m slippin, I’ve fallen, I can’t get up.”

Richman is searching for a “unique resolution” that includes a “60-day study of his client by qualified consultants rather than prison.” The goal is to return DMX to the stage so he can pay back the $1.7 million that he owes.

DMX allegedly earned $2.3 million from 2010 to 2015, but didn’t give any back to Uncle Sam.

Prosecutors want DMX in jail for at least five years to prove “star power does not entitle someone to free pass.” Yup, it just puts them in the Oval Office.