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Heidi Montag Now Says She Briefly Died From Cosmetic Surgery-A-Thon in ’09

Sometimes there’s a high price to pay to be a C-list celebrity. But if you don’t make the kind of sacrifices it requires, you won’t get to rub elbows with Alex Jones or be a cutaway gag on Family Guy.

For Heidi Montag, being on the C-list has meant telling the same story about how she almost died getting ten cosmetic surgery procedures in the span of a day basically the exact same way for almost ten years, making it just a little more dramatic each time.

Here’s how Montag told the story back in 2010, close to when it actually happened.

“I almost died after my procedure,” Heidi told Access Hollywood’s Billy Bush on Monday. “I had too much Demerol like Michael Jackson did and my breathing was five breaths per minute which is like almost dead. [I was] in an aftercare center, there were nurses that were supposed to be tending to me at all times.

“So thank God, Charles, one of my security guys used to be an EMT, and he was timing my breath on his watch and he called the nurses and they had to put oxygen on my face and called my plastic surgeon to come in for an emergency. So, it was a very traumatic experience for me,” she continued.

Pretty scary, she almost died, the nurses had to give her an oxygen mask. But look at how she tells the story to Paper these days.

“Spencer thought he lost me,” Heidi says, emotionless as if she’s processed the story too many times for any feelings to remain. “I died for a minute. With that much surgery, I had to have 24-hour nurse care and Spencer didn’t want to leave my side. I was at a recovery center and had Demerol to deal with the pain because it was so extreme. My security guards called Spencer and told him, ‘Heidi’s heart stopped. She’s not going to make it.’ And I easily could’ve. Cutting yourself up isn’t something I’d recommend, and Demerol isn’t anything to play around with. That’s how Michael Jackson died.”

The same “This is how Michael Jackson died,” but now her heart stopped and they told Spencer she was dead instead of telling the nurse her breathing was slow.

Here’s the thing about Heidi Montag. She has a long, long history of lying about shit to get headlines. She’s faked a divorce from her unbearable husband Spencer Pratt. She claimed Jennifer Aniston banned her from the premiere of Just Go With It, a film Montag had a minor supporting role in, and then admitted she just couldn’t find a dogsitter. She also claimed she was tortured and held against her will on the set of I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here, which is a double lie because she wasn’t tortured and she’s not a celebrity. Oh, and in the span of one week, she said she was addicted to cosmetic surgery and then said she doesn’t know why people keep saying she’s addicted to cosmetic surgery.

So yeah, Heidi has her story down to an art form now. I’m guessing there were no complications from her surgeries, if she even really had ten. Maybe it was nine. Maybe it was three. It could have been thirty. We’ll never know, because Heidi Montag lies about everything.

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