DJ Khaled is a real American hero. He is out there, sacrificing himself so that all of the rest of us can get laid. You see, Khaled really put his foot in his mouth in an interview on The Breakfast Club, a syndicated morning radio show, when he said his foot is the only thing he puts in his mouth. Well, that and vodka-soaked cheerios.
ok so I'm convinced he has the mind of a teenage boy pic.twitter.com/epzhPjceny
— ban all non hunter gatherers (@RaccoonCanada) May 4, 2018
Yeah, DJ Khaled said he doesn’t eat pussy, to the shock of all the hosts. You’d think no one would care, because lots of people do and don’t do things sexually that other people do, and it’s probably in really bad taste to publicly shame someone for not perfoming a sexual act if you think about it.
This story really took off, though, and here’s the reason why; guys were low-key sending this to women they’re thirsty for with quote tweets like “Oh, I love to eat the pussy, I’d do it every night and not even expect my lady to go down on me in return. You hear that Lauren? Does your man do that?” You could see it in almost every tweet about him, which all probably should have ended with “… ladies.”
“I’m not DJ Khaled” pic.twitter.com/QOOwmQasMO
— Mike Drucker (@MikeDrucker) May 6, 2018
I’m not DJ Khaled pic.twitter.com/vBUDSV4imL
— Danny Bland (@mrdannybland) May 7, 2018
I saw tons of people make this exact same joke when this meme started going around this weekend, for example.
Ahem.. *clears throat*
as a man, I take great pride in mastering ALL performances. This is probably a little TMI.. I will now quietly excuse myself from this fun thread 👀— Dwayne Johnson (@TheRock) May 6, 2018
A pussy who won’t eat pussy? Come on man what is wrong wid you?
— Tommy Chong (@tommychong) May 7, 2018
Even celebrities are in on the “I’m a hero because I lick vaginas” train. I don’t know what I didn’t want to know more, that DJ Khaled doesn’t eat pussy or that Tommy Chong still does.
Thankfully, Billy Eichner is out there asking the real questions.
.@djkhaled u eat butt?
— billy eichner (@billyeichner) May 6, 2018
See, arguing over if men should eat pussy is so 2009. Now the question is “do you eat ass?” Personally, I will do whatever it takes to please my partner… ladies. Now excuse me while I post this article somewhere I’m sure all the girls I had a crush on in high school who are still single will read it.
The tone of these articles is on point, good to see The Blemish going back to its roots. :)