Catherine Zeta-Jones Is Tired of Pretending She Doesn’t Think She’s Better Than You

Sometimes we mistake being talented with being a good person and being an untalented shallow moron with being a bad person, so it’s nice when a story comes along that puts that sort of thing into perspective. While vapid reality star Kim Kardashian-West was lobbying the president to commute the sentence of a poor black woman in her 60s who was given life in prison for thinking about maybe selling drugs, Catherine Zeta-Jones was busy telling The Mirror she’s tired of pretending she’s not better than the hoi polloi.

Catherine, 48, says: “One thing I’m not is humble any more. I’m sick of being humble. I really am. ‘So sorry I’m rich, so sorry I’m married to a movie star, so sorry I’m not so bad looking.’

“No sorrys. Enough. All that is important to me now is my work.

“That’s what I love and the rest of my life is a joy because I’ve got two beautiful kids and a healthy, happy husband. It’s all good, and I’m not going to be humble for that either.”

She sounds like exactly the sort of person who gets on Twitter and talks about how super progressive they are and then complains about Jeremy Corbyn and suggests Labour elect a leader who is to the right of Thatcher.

When’s the last time you said “We have to go see this Catherine Zeta-Jones movie?” Hell, when is the last time you saw Catherine Zeta-Jones in a movie you liked? Was it Chicago, because that was in theaters over 15 years ago. If you’re not a fan of musicals, it was probably High Fidelity. There are kids who were born when that movie was in theaters who just graduated high school. But good on her, I think it’s great that she’s still in the headlines two decades after the last time she did anything people actually cared about.

She also says she has two children who want to be actors.

Catherine says: “I have two kids who want to be actors and I am so proud. It’s not about fame for them. They’ve been brought up around famous people. They know what that is like.

“They want the craft because that’s what they love. And it gives me such pride that they get it. They understand that this is not a quick fix. They’re so good. I can’t wait for you all to see which way they’re going to go because they’re going to go somewhere, I’m telling you.”

I mean, that’s great. Being related to a famous person means you should be famous, too. It’s not like one of Bobby Kennedy’s kids is going to get elected to Congress and then vote to expand our nuclear weapons arsenal because he didn’t know what yes and no meant. Wait, that actually happened? But who could doubt the acting chops of Jaden Smith, Sofia Coppola or Jim Belushi, except everyone. At least Allison Willams getting a rimjob on Girls was pretty hot, as well as being the only thing Lena Dunham has ever been involved in that was worth watching.

But look, Catherine Zeta-Jones is just plain better than you, and she’s tired of pretending she’s not. And her kids are going to be better than you, too. Now if you’ll please leave her alone, she’s got to go and talk about how she’s very concerned with sexism in Hollywood and then vote for someone who promised they’d cut funding for the NHS to lower her taxes.

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