ESC

Orlando Bloom Shut Down His Play to Tell Woman to ‘Put That Fucking iPad Away’

It’s kind of rude to use your mobile device during a movie. The theater is dark and that bright-ass light coming off your phone is distracting. I’m not willing to entertain any other opinions on this other than maybe that I’m being too soft and that people who use their phones during movies should be dragged into the street and shot.

If using a mobile phone in a movie theater is bad, using a mobile phone during a live theatre performance is worse. Chris Hemsworth can’t see you checking your phone every five minutes during Thor: Ragnarok because Taika Waititi couldn’t give a single dramatic moment space to breathe without punctuating the scene with a joke, but I digress. Actors in live theatre can see you on your phone and it can be distracting while they’re trying to perform.

Orlando Bloom wasn’t having it at a London performance of Killer Joe where a woman had her iPad out. Theatre critic Mark Shenton reported that at the performance he attended, Bloom stopped the play and told a woman “I need YOU to put [your] iPad AWAY NOW!” and then again stopped and said “Put that fucking iPad away now and I will wait”.

Another theatre-goer reported that Bloom yelled at the woman in-character, so it’s entirely possible he didn’t actually lose his shit on her, he is playing the titular character in Killer Joe, a contract killer in a Texas trailer park.

It turns out the woman wasn’t being rude intentionally, she was using the iPad battery to run a portable fan. Apparently the theater wanted to really give theater-goers the feeling of being in a Texas trailer park by not being air conditioned.

Still, there are better ways to run a hand-held fan than with your iPad. Who even takes their iPad with them to a theater performance in the first place? The only reason I can think of is that terrorists might take over the theater and threaten to kill everyone unless someone lets them watch GLOW on Netflix right the fuck now. Outside of that scenario, there’s literally no reason you’d ever need to have an iPad with you in a theater.

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