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Bill Cosby Is Probably Going to Die in Prison

You know what’s a real shame? That Bill Cosby wasn’t the dude working at Trader Joe’s while Geoffrey Owens made billions of dollars. As far as I know, Owens has raped zero people while Cosby has raped at least one, the one he’s going to jail for. Actually, when you’re reading this, Cosby is most likely sitting in some kind of cell, as he left the courthouse in handcuffs after being sentenced to three to ten years in prison.

Before we go any further, let’s take a look at Bill Cosby leaving the courtroom in handcuffs.

Now, what’s important to know here is that Cosby was denied bail while awaiting his appeal, which means he’s going to start serving his sentence while he goes through the appeals process. He was in his 80s, he was probably hoping he could ride the appeals process all the way to the grave and not see the inside of a prison. CNN took a look inside the prison and it’s nice as prisons go, which is to say it’s not nice at all but it’s still clean because it just opened in June.

I think the most important story here is that Cosby brought this upon himself. And not even by being a big rapist while also being a moral scold, complaining about how kids need to pull up their pants while he was drugging women in order to pull their pants down.

No, what I mean is that Cosby could have avoided this conviction if he had just gone away. Take a look at this tweet from MSNBC host and legal expert Ari Melber.

A key legal step to Cosby’s conviction was his own decision to *sue his accusers* for defamation — which backfired by unleashing new civil evidence against him that supported criminal prosecution.

There may not have been enough evidence to convict Cosby, and the prosecution probably wouldn’t have moved forward with the arrest and trial if it wasn’t for Cosby trying to sue the women he raped for saying he raped them.

The dude was in his 80s, and the reason he tried to sue these women to shut them up was so he could keep doing his stand-up tour. He didn’t need the money, it was all pride. And the funniest thing is that after the allegations were public, suing the women didn’t matter. Everyone had made up their minds, and the people who weren’t going to go see him weren’t going to see him even if his lawsuit had been successful. He wasn’t going to change any minds. And when he tried to sue those women, he knew he did it; he just thought he could use his money to scare them and shut them up, and that ended up being the thing that really caused his downfall.

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Magyar McTavish

I don’t know. A cold aluminum toilet seat does not appeal to me.

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