We now know what Victoria Beckham has been up to that’s kept her too busy to join the Spice Girls reunion tour, and I think we’ll all agree that she’s made the right choice. Posh has started her own YouTube channel on how to be, well, posh.
You know, they don’t just give a YouTube channel to just anyone, it’s clearly a bigger deal than reuniting the biggest pop act of the 90s. With some hard work and good fortune, she could be a household name like Pewdiepie, KeemStar, JonTron or Boogie2988!
Personally, the thing I’m most looking forward to about Posh’s YouTube channel is the article I get to write next month when she calls some 12-year-old the n-word for playing Hanzo during an Overwatch stream. YouTube doesn’t have a lot of rules for content creators, but they’re pretty firm on all major channels saying a bunch of dumb, racist nonsense.
While Posh is on her mission to be the next Shoe0nHead (who has 40 times as many subscribers as Posh as of this writing), her husband David is keeping himself busy by posting pictures of him and their daughter kissing on the lips on Instagram.
That’s not normal, is it? Is that something British people do? I’ve never once kissed either of my parents on the lips. In fact, I’ve never kissed anyone I’m related to on the lips, not even a hot distant cousin.
Now, I’m not saying there’s anything inappropriate going on here, I want to make that very clear. It’s not like when Tom Brady kissed his son, because, you know, there’s no tongue with the Beckhams. It’s just an innocent peck on the lips, there’s nothing wrong with it. We just don’t want to see it, okay?
We didn’t want to see it last time either, dude, learn your lesson. This is how kids end up breastfeeding until their junior year of college.