Every year film critic TC Candler and The Independent Critics release a list of the 100 Most Beautiful Women and the 100 Most Handsome Men. Why? I don’t know, because they’re dudes who want an excuse to sift through tens of thousands of pictures of beautiful women. I’m sympathetic to that, it’s why I write stories like “This Playboy Playmate Got a New Toothbrush” and then spend the day doing “research” on some model’s Instagram feed.
Like me, TC and his friends pretend what they’re doing is important when we’re basically just hoping you can’t access PornHub from work but still need something to think about in the men’s room on your 15 minute break. Here’s how they describe their selection criteria.
Aesthetic perfection is only one of the criteria. Grace, elegance, originality, daring, passion, class, poise, joy, promise, hope… they are all embodied in a beautiful face. With those criteria in mind, TC Candler and the members select only 100 faces out of the approximately 85,000 female celebrities (which works out to less than 0.0012%). It is a thankless task, as no individual will ever agree with all of the choices. However, the general consensus has been that the INDEPENDENT CRITICS have created a celebratory list that cherishes the feminine aesthetic and opens the world’s eyes to a unique, diverse and international collection of beautiful faces.
After their long, exhaustive search, they settled on a French teenager which seems… yeah, that seems about right. Winner Thylane Blondeau is 17 had previously won when she was 9, which is weird because I’ve never in my life seen a 9-year-old and thought they were beautiful.
I mean, I guess she is very attractive. I know you’re about to be like “Oh my god, she’s only 17, this is so messed up,” but she lives in France where the age of consent is 15 and the First Lady was one of those teachers who slept with her student before that student went on to become the least popular elected leader in the world, so you’re basically just screaming into the void.
Personally, I think runner-up Chou Tzu-yu was robbed. Also, she’s 19, so we can say she’s hot without being scolded by the Internet, unless they also want to cast aspersions at their precious Leonardo DiCaprio. Tzuyu is a singer in the K-Pop band Twice.
She is so adorable.
There’s also a men’s list which was topped by Jason Momoa, and, again, a K-Pop singer was robbed, because there’s no planet on which Jason Momoa is more handsome than BTS leader Jungkook.