Lousy Tip Gets Customer Salsa With an Extra Helping of Scrotum

Here’s a life tip and an etiquette lesson rolled into one; if you’re in America, tip your servers. They’re making basically nothing because they get paid in tips, don’t be the guy who goes “Well, if they don’t make enough in tips the business has to pay them the difference up to our starvation-level minimum wage.” It’s part of the contract of the food service industry. Menu prices are lower because you’re expected to tip your server or delivery driver.

What happens if you don’t? Well, for starters, someone might dip their balls in your food like Louie from The State.

Yes, according to WNDU in Indiana, a delivery driver was arrested after he posted a video online of himself dunking his manberries in a customer’s salsa because they only tipped 89 cents.

The delivery driver allegedly recorded it and posted a video online, saying “This is what you get when you give an 89 cents tip for an almost 30-minute drive.”

News outlets report that the passenger, 31-year-old Howard Matthew Webb, was arrested last week and charged with adulteration of food.

I know you’re sitting there thinking to yourself “Well, he got caught, people won’t do this, my delivery food is perfectly safe to eat even though I’m an asshole to all the employees and do that think where i put a stack of singles on the table and take one away every time the server displeases me.”

There’s one little problem with that; most people aren’t dumb enough to post a video online of them dunking their balls in your salsa or jerking off into your milkshake or sticking your chopsticks up their ass. They still do it, they just don’t incriminate themselves. So think about that the next time you want to be a dick to a waiter.

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