R. Kelly Tells Court He Can’t Read, Which is Much More Believable Than ‘She Looked 18’

R. Kelly has a new legal strategy to deal with losing a civil case against a girl who claims the singer abused her when she was 16; he’s saying he’s really stupid. Which I think might work, because have you ever heard R. Kelly talk for even a second? TMZ had the scoop.

More significantly, though, according to the docs … Kelly “suffers from a learning disability that adversely affects his ability to read,” adding … “in essence he cannot.”

Translation — Kelly had no idea what the legal papers were all about, so he didn’t take the appropriate steps after being served to defend himself.

It is true that the reason R. Kelly lost this case is because he failed to appear in court. And I have to admit that if your court case depends on R. Kelly being really, really stupid, it’s a good position to be in.

So R. Kelly has a lot of legal troubles and just troubles generally over the fact that everyone suddenly cares he’s been allegedly having sex with underaged girls for basically his entire adult life. Speaking of which:

The new legal docs also blast the fact Kelly was served while incarcerated, claiming Williams’ lawyers could have easily served Kelly’s criminal lawyer or delivered the docs to Trump Towers where he lives. Williams’ lawyer has said security at his residence made that impossible, but Kelly’s attorney calls BS on that.

This is also super unsurprising. If I were, allegedly, an illiterate pedophile, I think I’d fit right in at Trump Towers.