Pete Davidson Doesn’t Understand Why Everyone Wants to Punch Him in His Dumb Face

Does anyone actually like Pete Davidson? Have you ever met a Pete Davidson fan? I have discussed Pete Davidson with plenty of people, and never once has anyone said “Oh, I love that guy!” The responses I’ve gotten have been either “I can’t stand that guy,” or “Who?”

Davidson did a bit on SNL this weekend that started with him saying he doesn’t understand why “everyone wants to punch me in the throat” for dating a celebrity.

There’s a fundamental misunderstanding on Davidson’s part because, at least as far as I’m concerned, my desire to punch him in the throat has nothing to do with who he’s dating.

To be honest, the self-deprecating act really works for him, especially comparing himself to Eddie Murphy and saying it’ll remind people why they stopped watching SNL in the first place. It works for him because when I hear it I’m just like “yeah, you are the fucking worst and you aren’t funny, good observation, Pete.”

Davidson was talking about his relationship with Kaia Gerber, who is Cindy Crawford’s daughter who could do better.

Davidson also joked about going to rehab over the production break, which might explain a lot about why that dude is 15 and looks like original Rolling Stones who got replaced by some spry 60-year-old.

But honestly, Pete, if you have a Google alert set up for yourself like a bunch of other celebrities do, I hope you’re okay. Honestly. My job is pretty difficult and having you there to make fun of makes it so much easier because the jokes just write themselves, you drank-out-of-the-wrong-cup-in-Last-Crusade-lookin’ motherfucker.

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