ESC

There’s Coronavirus Porn For You To Watch If You’re Quarantined Because of Coronavirus

Composite

In Japan, all the schools are closed to avoid spreading the coronavirus, so the publishers of weekly comic anthologies Shonen Jump and Shonen Sunday, which carry manga titles such as One Piece and Detective Conan, are giving away free digital copies of their comics and cable channels Animax and Kids Station are free for the month. In America, we’ve got coronavirus-themed porn on Pornhub.

This is why we won World War II.

Vox ran a story all about how Pornhub is packed with coronavirus porn and I had to check it out for myself because when else do you get to watch porn for work? I want to talk about some of them so just don’t open any links in the rest of this article at work.

This first video is only 19 seconds long and for some reason the… uh… female lead… is wearing her face mask around her eyes instead of over her mouth and nose. I don’t think this couple is very serious about stoping the spread of COVID-19, you guys.

Because the coronavirus outbreak started in Wuhan and China has by far the largest outbreak of the virus so far, most of these videos feature Asian women, so that is a lucky break for us, but it feels a little racist because people are just adding the coronavirus tag to unrelated videos with Asian women. Not that I’m really complaining.

But the best thing to come out of this is this video with two people in hazmat suits fucking. So hot.

Vox talked to one of the madmen behind this brilliant turn of events.

“We knew that the corona event was ‘good viral material’ but we also knew it was affecting people in tragic ways,” Spicy said. “We didn’t want to insult them by making it too real. We personally know people actually stuck in Wuhan and made it with them in mind.” They asked themselves: Would they be offended by this? Or would this take their minds off their situation? “We want the latter.”

It’s good be mindful, but I feel like any porn is going to get your mind off your situation for a little bit. Until you’re looking for a tissue and go “well, I have this mask here…”

Subscribe
Notify of
guest
0 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Latest
Load more