The ‘Tiger King’ Biopic Everyone Keeps Talking About is a Real Thing That is Actually Happening

One of the best tweets of all time is Mike Ginn’s famous “My “Not involved in human trafficking” T-shirt has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my shirt.”

I bring this up because the New York Post ran a headline today that said “‘Tiger King’ star Carole Baskin: I did not put my husband in a meat grinder” and I just can’t stop thinking about it. That’s not even the main focus of the show, it’s basically just a subplot. Someone on this show is potentially a Kingsman villain and it isn’t even in the top ten things about this show people won’t shut up about.

There’s going to be another TV show based the Tiger King people, this one a dramatization produced by and starring Kate McKinnon. The project was announced in November, which feels like ten years ago but was actually only about four-and-a-half months ago.

Sylvester Stallone and his family have already dressed up like the personae dramatis of the unbelievable reality show in case you’re wondering what McKinnon’s biopic might look like.

Carole Baskin, who can’t stress enough that she absolutely did not put her husband through a meat grinder and feed him to her exotic cats in a scene reminiscent of the one that pushed Rorschach over the edge in Watchmen is imploring McKinnon not to use real big cats in her production, though. “Real big cats” sounds like a ska band, but I don’t want to listen to it.

I just want to know that the Joe Exotic condoms will be featured in the McKinnon series.

Yeah, that really happened. I’d still vote for him before Joe Biden or Donald Trump, honestly.

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