Tori Spelling is So Broke She’s Having Assets Seized

Tori Spelling is having a rough time of it and I almost feel sorry for her. I say almost because she grew up in a house with over 100 rooms in it and it’s really hard to feel sorry for someone whose biggest problem is that they can’t adjust to affluence after a life of opulence.

Seriously, if you put every house on the block I grew up on together into one house, that house would be smaller than the house Tori Spelling grew up in.

But now Spelling is so deeply in debt that she’s actually having assets seized.

Us Weekly reports that American Express seized the cash Spelling owed them from her bank account to the tune of $88k.

If you’re not familiar with who Tori Spelling is or why it’s crazy she’s broke, her father was Aaron Spelling, the creator of almost every TV show that ran between about 1970 and 1998. When he died, he was worth over half a billion dollars and he’s still one of the highest-paid TV producers more than a decade after he died, but he left most everything to Tori’s mother while she and her brother both got a little less than a million dollars, which he thought was enough for them to live on for the rest of their lives.

To be fair, if you or I had a million dollars we probably could retire. You would need to move to a cheaper city, live in a small house and have a simple life without servants, but you could do it. If you invested a million dollars in a way that gave you a 5% return annually, you’d be close to the average American household income, and that isn’t an impossible figure. Tori was just really bad with money, and that average American household income is what her mom said she’d drop on a trip to the store.

So Tori’s money problems are mostly her own fault, and her estimated net worth is just about the same as what she got from the one season of BH90210 that got made last year. She is not good with money.