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Man Determined to Get His Penis Off His Arm

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Six years ago, Malcolm MacDonald’s penis turned black and dropped on the floor. For years, he had dealt with an infection in his perineum and he never knew this was what would happen.

“When I saw my penis go black I was beside myself. It was like a horror film. I was in a complete panic. I knew deep down it was gone and I was going to lose it,” he said.

Resigned to his fate, he picked it up and threw it in the trash.

“I went to the hospital and they said the best they could do for me was to roll the remaining stump up like a little sausage roll. It was heartbreaking.”

Two years later, MacDonald was given hope. He paid the penis master, Professor David Ralph of London’s University College Hospital, $65,000 to grow a new penis on his arm.

David Ralph said he could attach a bionic penis on his arm for 2 years and attach it to his stump. He even added 2 extra inches to MacDonald’s new designer penis per his request. Because, obviously.

His new penis would have blood vessels and nerves. But he will need to pump it to achieve an erection. He nicknamed his new floppy friend Jimmy. He and Jimmy were a hit among his friends, at parties and pubs. Check out the NSFW video here.

It’s been four years of Jimmy helicoptering on his arm and, unfortunately, missed appointments, scheduling issues, staff shortages and now the coronavirus has delayed the transition to his stump.

MacDonald is hopeful one day he won’t have a penis on his arm. Though, until there’s someone available for the surgery, he’ll at least have a great opener at the bar.

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