Seattle Seahawks Rookie Cut After Trying to Sneak Woman Disguised as a Player Into His Hotel Room

The NFL is taking COVID-19 seriously, and you know they mean business because just look at how seriously they’ve taken CTE. Yeah, we’re all going to die because of pro sports, aren’t we?

If you’re Kemah Siverand and you’re an NFL rookie, you’ve probably been hearing ‘WAP’ all week and probably thinking “yeah, that sounds good, I could go for some of that.” But for various reasons, like it’s training camp and there’s a pandemic so there are pretty strict guidelines in place and so you can’t have any visitors.

But Kemah Siverand isn’t going to be denied wet-ass pussy so easily. I mean, after all, what’s the point of being a professional athlete if you can’t use it to get laid?

So Siverand hatched a plan to sneak a woman into his room; he dressed her up in Seahawks gear to disguise her as a player. It did not work out well for him.

So what precautions is the league taking? Well, according to Complex, “teams can be fined up to $50,000 for players who refuse to submit to coronavirus testing, while players can be fined up to $14,650 for failure to wear a mask, properly social distance, and for not wearing their Kinexon device which warns players when they’re too close to someone.

And they’re all going to run into each other and swear and spit and breathe all over each other for three hours a week every week for the next 22 weeks or so. Good plan.

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