Jewel showed up at the Country Music Association Awards looking like this. Apart from the usual snaggle tooth, her breasts have either shrunk or that dress was built for someone more bountiful, say… Jessica Simpson. They look like two smooshed pieces of dough. Like you went to Baskin Robbins and got two scoops of boob. I’m officially freaked out. Not as freaked out as the time my roommate sleepwalked into my room and cuddled with me, but freaked out nonetheless. I’ve included old pictures of Jewel for comparison.