Ben Affleck lost his virginity again

Ben Affleck

Ben Affleck lost his virginity again when he underwent colonic irrigation. Colonic irrigation is where they push warm water through your intestines to flush out all the, um, excrement.

I lost my virginity all over again that day, in so many ways. I don’t think I will be having it done again.

Looks like this wins for best Valentine’s Day story. I don’t think anyone’s ho-hum romantic candlelit dinner experience could top a colon cleaning. This could also make the perfect Valentine’s gift. But if you can’t afford it, get them the colonic irrigation alternative, an enema. Honestly, I’m puzzled as to why people don’t come to me for gift ideas more often.

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3 Comments on "Matt Damon, Ben Affleck And HBO Reveals Winner Of ‘Project Greenlight’ Season 4"

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The problem with common sense is that it isn’t that common anymore, as evidenced by the reaction’s to Matt’s completely common sense position.

is not up to you Erik, to say which type of sexual misconduct was “not as bad” and to establish if Dylan Farrow’s allegations are or aren’t true. Mansplaining sexual abuse to women, and given massive yet not surprising extent of what the #mettoo movement has shown to us. is safe to say all of us have been a victim of in one way or another. So no, not Damon nor you can explain to us was is “not as bad”. The women CK harassed have had their careers and lives derailed by his behaviour that you guys see as… Read more »

Saying that bad acts are on a continuum isn’t controversial at all. Saying this?

“I think you can say that while also saying that maybe what Louis C.K. did wasn’t as bad or even that the allegations that Woody Allen molested Dylan Farrow probably aren’t true.”
Is complete horseshit. Louis C.K.’s shit is incredibly bad, and he completely deserves what’s happening to him. But above all, if you think that Woody Allen probably didn’t molest Dylan Farrow, you’re either completely misinformed (which at this point, for anyone in media, is gross negligence) or you’re a monstrous asshole. Period.

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