R.I.P. Charlton Heston

Charlton Heston passed away on Saturday at his Beverly Hills home at the age of 84. The famed actor suffered from the late stages of Alzheimer’s disease. He is best known for his roles as Moses in The Ten Commandments and Ben Hur in Ben Hur. He was also known to be a proponent of the second amendment and is famous for his quote “from my cold, dead hands.” He is survived by a son, a daughter and three grandchildren.

“We knew him as an adoring husband, a kind and devoted father, and a gentle grandfather, with an infectious sense of humor,” the family said. “He served these far greater roles with tremendous faith, courage and dignity. He loved deeply, and he was deeply loved.”

If I know Charlton Heston, and I like to think that I do, he’s probably in a happy place hootin’ and hollerin’, shooting his pistols in the air like Yosemite Sam and has accidentally shot an angel from the sky and he swears it was just an accident, honest, and now he has to throw it into the trunk of his car and drive to the desert to bury it because he can’t go back to jail, man. He just can’t.

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capt. cornhole
capt. cornhole
13 years ago

Somebody quick pry the gun from his cold dead hand!

capt. cornhole
capt. cornhole
13 years ago

Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!

You bastards! Damn you all to Hell!

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