‘When Asses Attack’ Starring Monica Alvarez

We should put Monica Alvarez’s ass in every suicide center across the nation. Every time someone gets depressed, they’d rest their head on her butt and realize, holy s**t, there’s a reason to live. Even the women would be like, damn, that’s…a great ass. Let me hit the gym now.

My extensive search of the Internets reveals Alvarez bartends at Lavo in Queens. Wow, that’s interesting. The NY Post named her one of NYC’s ten sexiest servers. That’s how I know, not that I’m a creeper. Well, I keep my creeping under wraps and wouldn’t announce it to the world. If you’re ever in NYC, hit up Lavo and say hi. Tell ’em The Blemish sent you. Don’t rest your head on her ass unless you’re suicidal.

Flashback 💁🏻 | 📷 @bryandewitt

A photo posted by Mónica Alvarez 🇮🇹🇪🇸 (@monicaalvarez03) on

Missing that miami Heat already 💦| just another iPhone shot from my shoot with @nick.ramirez0 the other day 😎

A photo posted by Mónica Alvarez 🇮🇹🇪🇸 (@monicaalvarez03) on

Do you Follow me on snap chat? Handle: monica03alvarez 😊 | 📷 by @darion_ko #mycalvins

A photo posted by Mónica Alvarez 🇮🇹🇪🇸 (@monicaalvarez03) on

Monday's in #mycalvins | 📷 @darion_ko

A photo posted by Mónica Alvarez 🇮🇹🇪🇸 (@monicaalvarez03) on

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