ESC

Nose Hair Extensions Should Not Catch On

The Internet is the best and worst place in the world. It’s the best place because you get to interact with cool people and you have millions of information pieces at your fingertips. It’s the worst place because of things like this:

That’s an Instagram post by a user named GretChen Chen. She has 726 followers and wouldn’t normally make an impact. But, the Internet.

Chen’s post of nose hair extensions has gone viral and now this is going to be a thing. It should not be a thing. For the love of God, no one make this a thing. I can’t name you a single person who wants a single nose hair showing, so why would you want your nose looking like Tom Selleck’s mustache? You wouldn’t. But people are definitely going to do this because they think it’s funny, gross, cool, or a combination for the three.

I’m not even going to give GretChen Chen credit for doing something so creative that people took notice. Because this is a bad use of creativity. She could have done a cool piece of art and been more productive. Less people would have cared, but it means no one would be painting on fake nose hairs with their make-up.

This is all the fault of Devon Abelman, who wrote about Chen for Allure and made this a thing that I now have to write about. Why do we have these weekly writer meetings if we’re just going to ignore the “don’t give attention to bad ideas” rule?

Ladies, use your fake eyelashes and eyeliner for your eyes. Not your nose. Don’t even do this ironically. Don’t make this a Snapchat filter, a meme, a GIF, or whatever hip thing the kids are into today. Just ignore it and hope it goes away forever.

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