Sarah Jessica Parker doesn’t care she’s ugly

Maxim magazine recently named Sarah Jessica Parker as one of the unsexiest women alive along with Madonna, Amy Winehouse, Britney Spears and Sandra Oh. However, this doesn’t bother her in the slightest. SJP says,

“What they don’t know is that one day I’ll wake up fat. But I’ll still be happy, just like I am now.
“I believe in the old ’sticks and stones’ philosophy, so frankly their words don’t come close to hurting. And it does not bother me in the least if people don’t think I’m sexy.
“I don’t think I am, either.”

It makes me so angry when people turn the other cheek. How dare they not stoop to my level of immaturity. When I call Sarah Jessica Parker a horse, I expect tears like the ones I get from 7-year-olds when I run over their Nintendo DS with my car. Her ambivalence is unacceptable. Now I just want to stomp around my room and kick my stuffed animals in frustration. Take that Mr. Fluffles.