Amy Winehouse

Amy Winehouse will be sent to an Israeli rehab right after a Christmas “blow-out”. The cocaine loving singer wants to clean up her act and reinvent herself at the Grammies in Los Angeles. An easy feat as long as she doesn’t start snorting blow or die on stage.

“She wants to give the performance of her life in LA. But she’s going to throw a party over Christmas – which will probably be a messy affair.”

$20 says Amy Winehouse overdoses before the New Year. I think the only dreams Amy Winehouse ever has are ones of her and a brick of cocaine holding hands, skipping through a field of daisies. Obviously, she’s pretty crazy about the powder so it’s going to take a little more than her word to keep her in rehab. I’d suggest chaining her in the basement like they did to Christina Aguilera’s husband. That’s what happened to him, right? Because it would be a pretty cruel joke by his parents to have him be born like that. You mean he was born like that? Whoops.