Salma Hayek

Last September, Salma Hayek gave birth to French billionaire Francois-Henri Pinault’s daughter, Valentina. They were engaged to be married. Now they’re not. Their rep tells USA Today:

“We are sad to announce the engagement of Salma Hayek and Francois-Henri Pinault has been canceled. There will be no further comment.”

Valentina is like the golden egg. Pinault is such a sucker. All Salma had to do was carry a baby to term, birth it out, thus ripping her vagina wide open, and take care of her until she turns 18, but Pinault has to cut her a check for 20 grand a month. I think we know who got the better end of this deal.