The November issue of W features an interview with Angelina Jolie where she reveals she’s already bought Maddox knives. Gasp!

“My mom took me to buy my first daggers when I was 11 or 12. And I’ve already bought Maddox some things. We take him to a special shop.” She emphasizes that the knife blades are dulled so they’re not dangerous, and that the purchases are accompanied by discussions about violence. But, she says, “we also talk about samurais and about the idea of defending someone as good. We talk about everything.”

No freaking way. If Angelina thinks she can corner the child knife fight video market and do it with dulled knives, she better think again. I have an armory full of sharp weaponry and five basements worth of hungry children ready to do battle. We’ll see who’s better at child exploitation. Your or me. It’s on, bitch.

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