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‘Django Unchained’ Actress Was Having Car Sex

Django Unchained actress Daniele Watts was arrested last Thursday for what she and her boyfriend summed up as making out while black. They claimed police implied they were a hooker and her John. But, wait. *record scratch*

Apparently someone had called the cops on them saying they were performing a lewd act. At first, it sounded like some uppity old white guy wanting them to get off his lawn, but witnesses now say they were having car sex in the passenger seat with the door open.

The eyewitnesses said the guy was sitting in the seat, she was straddling him and it was for everyone to see. One eyewitness told cops they cleaned themselves up afterward with a tissue.

At least he didn’t throw it out on the street because no one likes a litterbug, bro.

In police audio obtained of the incident, it was Watts who appeared to be making assumptions. She immediately plays the race card, flees the scene when cops ask for ID (which legal experts say the officer did have the right to do) and then moves on to the “Do you know who I am?” card after another cop brings her back.

Her boyfriend’s polite conversation with the police was in direct contrast to what Watts did which was tell the officer, “I think I’d like to identify you… to my publicist,” “I serve freedom and love. You guys serve detainment. That’s cool,” and “I hope when you’re fucking your spouses you really feel alive.”

So what started out as a story about unjust racial profiling turned into a story about an entitled D-list actress who didn’t get her way. Looks like people are going to have to revise a few angry Facebook posts now.

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Kevin L.
Kevin L.
9 years ago

Self entitlement can be a fickle thing.

Val
Val
9 years ago

When you do things in public that are meant for a more private venue then don’t stand there and howl when you get called out. If you want respect act respectably in public.

Courtney
Courtney
9 years ago

When a police officer asks you to do something you DO IT! If you’re not doing anything wrong then why do you have to act like a brat and like you are above having to follow the law?! When you’re dealing with police you need to remember that they don’t know anything about the person they are approaching, so they base their opinion on you by the way you act in the first 5-10 seconds. If you’re gonna act disrespectful and shady then they have every right to think you’re hiding something or going to be a problem. Just follow… Read more »