Michael Jackson will earn a reported $10 million for showing up at the prince of Brunei’s 25th birthday party in England this weekend. Prince Azim had stated he would spare no expense to ensure his idol came and he isn’t even required to perform. I hear Michael is really excited about this party. He wants to know if a lot of children will be there. He really wants to talk to them about the dangers of wearing shirts and underwear. Did you know every year 200,000 children die in t-shirt and tighty whitey related deaths? That Michael. His only flaw is he cares too much.
The Rest of the Web, Friday, 4.28.17
Sign Me Up for This Napping Fitness Class
Beyoncé Ordering Food Has Turned into a Meme
Kids Who Want to Waste Thousands of Dollars Studying a Fake ‘Game of Thrones’ Language Are in Luck
Jennifer Lawrence Is Totally Marrying Darren Aronofsky This Summer
Katy Perry’s New Song Empowers Women To Have Food Sex or Something
Ja Rule’s $12,000 Ticket Music Festival Ends in ‘Lord of the Flies’ Nightmare With Kidnapping and Mugging Rumors
Obama’s First Joke About Trump Was Perfect
Rita Ora’s Gonna Regret This Outfit One Day
It’s Kylie Jenner’s Soulless Dead Eyes…And Her Sexy Midriff!
Kendall Jenner Gets Camera Shy Which Is Really Ironic
R. Kelly Sued for Nailing Sheriff Deputy’s Wife and Giving Her Chlamydia