ESC

Taylor Swift Shows You How to Work Out

I woke up this morning to the same clingy FaceTime phone call I get from my best friend every morning. He doesn’t care if I’m working. He doesn’t care if I’m vomiting over the toilet. He wants to be able to watch it and tell me his every thought as often as possible. Go to Taylor Swift’s Instagram right now. Knowing I don’t like Taylor Swift, he sweetens the pot. You’ll love this. 

I go to the most recent video on Taylor Swift’s Instagram and press play. I groan audibly. Keep watching. This bitch is cheapening one of the most iconic songs of the last five years. And then it happens… and then I knew I’d seen god.

Watch for yourself, and for your own safety don’t have anything in your mouth for the last ten seconds.

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