Michael Bay Set to Blow Up Your Childhood With ‘Dora the Explorer’ Movie

There’s a Dora The Explorer movie in the works. Nothing wrong with that. She’s a loveable little character that also helps young children learn some Spanish. She also wears a backpack, which is super stylish. I don’t know how she hasn’t explored everything just yet seeing as the show was on-air for 14-years, but she likes to take her time and take everything in. You know, good for her.

Michael Bay will produce the Dora The Explorer movie.

It will be a live-action movie, which is code for, “Michael Bay is going to blow a bunch of s**t up.”

The movie will follow a teenage Dora (because Michael Bay can’t oversexualize a 7-year-old), who moves to the city to live with her cousin, Diego. The city will then be attacked by robots and only Dora and Boots can save the city. Alright, the first part of that plot is true. The robots part isn’t. Yet.

Let’s see how Twitter is taking this news.

So, pretty much how I expected Twitter to react.

Who is this movie even for? Dora appealed to kids because it was a semi-interactive cartoon. It’s no longer a cartoon and, unless Dora is going to look at the audience for five seconds before running away from the explosion, it’s no longer semi-interactive. It’s not even appealing to kids if Dora is now a teenager.

This movie is for no one. Michael Bay just wants to blow up Spanish-speaking people.

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