Kim Kardashian and Chrissy Teigen Are Busting Kanye’s Balls on Twitter

Kanye West and I have the same birthday and ego size, so I feel a bit of affection for Yeezy. I know what it’s like to be a narcissist, so I know what Kanye is thinking when he posts a bunch of half-formed, poorly thought-out quotes on Twitter that sound really deep to him and pretty much no one else. He also called these tweets a book he was writing, refusing to be constrained by things like “editorial oversight” or “proofreading”. Boy, can I relate to that. Seriously, just ask my editor.

You know what else Kanye and I have in common? A loving and supportive partner who isn’t afraid to mercilessly roast us when we get a little too big for our britches. The big difference is my girlfriend doesn’t use Twitter and Kanye’s married to Kim Kardashian, so when he gets roasted by his wife on Twitter the whole world sees it.

Of course, this isn’t the first time Kanye West has gotten dunked on for thinking he’s deeper than he actually is.

I honestly never get tired of that. But luckily for Kanye, Kim still loves him more than Matt and Trey at South Park do.

That last tweet really put a damper on the original title I had for this article, “Kim Kardashian Moves in With Chrissy Teigen After Kanye Kicks Her Out.” Kanye’s lucky he’s not the one sleeping on Chrissy Teigen’s air mattress, because his tweets sound exactly like the sort of thing I used to say in high school to sound deep and intellectual around the big-titted morons I was into at the time. It’s a little disappointing to find out all these years later that actually would have worked had I stuck with it.

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