Calvin Klein Had to Apologize Because Bella Hadid Made Out With a Cartoon

The Blemish Dictionary defines “queer baiting” as any time a fictional character people on Twitter want to be gay isn’t. It’s one of the most annoying complaints because it’s always just the whiniest people watching Riverdale and complaining that Betty and Veronica aren’t dating even though they’d be so perfect together, and on top of that it’s also the mean name I always got called in middle school.

The latest supposed incident of queer baiting is a Calvin Klein ad that featured Bella Hadid making out with a CGI model called Lil Miquela. Sounds hot, this is the whole reason I bought a Sailor Jupiter body pillow. I mean, it was a joke, a gag gift, I don’t lovingly caress it at night, shut up.

That’s what these people are getting bent out of shape about?

Apparently, it’s offensive to have a straight actor play a gay character now, or just kiss a cartoon in a commercial.

This is why so many gay actors stay in the closet or claim to be bisexual until people are like “That’s not real, you’re just crazy like Anne Heche.” Because believe it or not, gay actors would like to get roles as straight characters, too. There’s actually a lot more of them and the whole point of acting is that the character you play isn’t like you in every way. For example, Lisa Kudrow is actually really smart and all of the guys on The Big Bang Theory are really dumb.

But I digress because Calvin Klein actually apologized for this, so, good job whiny internet nerds.

Here at CALVIN KLEIN, we welcome all types of constructive feedback from our community. We see your comments and we appreciate them. We'd like to offer our thoughts in response to comments on our campaign video featuring Bella Hadid and Lil Miquela. pic.twitter.com/OIcIekyR9K

— calvinklein (@CalvinKlein) May 17, 2019

The offensive part to me is saying that “This specific campaign was created to challenge conventional norms and stereotypes in advertising.” It was created to sell underpants.

By the way, is the sexy cartoon character 18?

She has so many things to do, you guys. She’s just like us, only not real.

For christ’s sakes, whoever had the idea to make Tony the Tiger act like a real person on social media is probably a billionaire now. And if someone made out with Tony in a commercial, it wouldn’t be bestiality.