Report: Constance Wu Lived in a Filthy Den of Rabbit S**t

Everyone hates Constance Wu now. If you haven’t been following along, it’s because when she found out her successful and beloved television sitcom Fresh Off the Boat was renewed she threw a hissy fit on Twitter because she wanted to be a movie star. Not that she actually, is, she was just in Crazy Rich Asians which, let’s be honest, if it was called Crazy Rich White People would have gotten some truly terrible reviews. And it’s great that Asian people can see themselves in middling romcoms, but if that movie had been on the Hallmark Channel instead of in theaters no one would have blinked an eye.

Now Page Six is reporting that Wu lived in a penthouse that was just rancid with rabbit s**t. No, really, she allegedly let her rabbit s**t all over the apartment.

One source in the building told Page Six, “Constance’s bunny totally destroyed the place, there was poop and pee everywhere, and the actress had done nothing to clean it up. The animal went all over the entranceway, the living room, the kitchen, the bedroom.”

I have cats, and sometimes cats s**t where they’re not supposed to s**t, but I clean that s**t up. A surprising amount of cat ownership involves cleaning up s**t to begin with. I don’t just leave it lying around.

Well, it’s not all bad, I guess, she just expected the housekeeper to clean up the animal s**t, it’s not like she slept in a bed covered in rabbit s**t or something.

A second source with direct knowledge of the pet pandemonium confirmed, “The place totally stank, it was disgusting, there were little pellets of poo everywhere, and Constance seemed oblivious to it. She seems to sleep with the bunny, and there was even poop in the bed.”

What the f**k, man? If my cat shits on my bed, I immediately wash the sheets.

I can’t even believe this story is real. It’s too convenient. Everyone hates her and all of the sudden she sleeps in a bed full of rabbit s**t? But they have multiple sources on this. That s**t is cray.