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Joe Rogan Details His Diarrhea Diet

On Saturday, Joe Rogan posted an update on his new carnivore diet, a diet that consists of nothing but meat. It’s only been a couple of weeks, but everything seems to be going well. Except for maybe the surprise diarrhea.

It’s a different thing, and with regular diarrhea I would compare it to a fire you see coming a block or two away and you have the time to make an escape, whereas this carnivore diet is like out of nowhere the fire is coming through the cracks, your doorknob is red hot, and all hope is lost.

Rogan says he hasn’t s**t his pants just yet, but it’s only a matter of time. And it sounds like it’s going to happen no matter how much superglue he shoves into his butthole.

On the bright side, he feels way more energetic and healthy which sounds like a fantastic tradeoff for sudden onset diarrhea that’s probably so powerful that the splashblack feels like an enema.

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Carnivore diet update; the good and the bad. Let’s start with the bad. There’s really only one “bad” thing, and that thing is diarrhea. I’m not sure diarrhea is an accurate word for it, like I don’t think a shark is technically a fish. It’s a different thing, and with regular diarrhea I would compare it to a fire you see coming a block or two away and you have the time to make an escape, whereas this carnivore diet is like out of nowhere the fire is coming through the cracks, your doorknob is red hot, and all hope is lost. I haven’t s**t my pants yet, but I’ve come to accept that if I keep going with this diet it’s just a matter of time before we lose a battle, and I fill my undies like a rainforest mudslide overtaking a mountain road. It’s that bad. It seems to be getting a little better every day, so there’s that to look forward to, but as of today I trust my butthole about as much as I trust a shifty neighbor with a heavy Russian accent that asks a lot of personal questions. The good: Now, I’m well aware of the placebo effect and I’m constantly self-analyzing every perceived reaction I’m having to eating only meat for almost 2 weeks straight, but one thing I’m fairly sure of is that my energy levels are higher and steadier throughout the day. This seems undeniable. I don’t know if it’s a temporary effect and if maybe it’s just the result of eating really disciplined, but either way it seems to be real. I’ve also felt really “healthy” (other than the sporadic bouts of hellacious projectile doodoo). Again, I don’t now if this is real or imagined, but I actually seem to feel happier and more balanced. This is the only time in my life I’ve ever tried eliminating carbs for more than a day or so, and since I started the diet a couple days before January I’m now about 13 days in, at least 7 pounds lighter, and in completely uncharted territory for me. Which makes me think this is probably completely uncharted territory for 99% of the people on earth. Anyway, I’ll keep you folks posted. This is my late night dinner of liver and bacon. Only my second meal of the day, I ate a fat ribeye at 1pm. #worldcarnivoremonth

A post shared by Joe Rogan (@joerogan) on

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TrumpLovesPutinsBalls
TrumpLovesPutinsBalls
8 months ago

All the roids the hobbit did.

Rache
Rache
8 months ago

He will probably be dead in a few years due to this ‘diet’

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