Beyonce and Jay-Z are engaged

The world’s ugliest rapper Jay-Z proposed to longtime girlfriend Beyonce Knowles during their trip to Cannes. The wedding will take place in Hawaii in autumn. Beyonce says,

“I want to get married and really want a family - in a perfect world I’d have two boys and a girl. You know someone loves you by the way he treats you and respects you. Me and Jay respect each other.”

At which point, Jay-Z nodded his head in approval and slowly pulled the knife away from Beyonce’s kidney.