Pete Doherty

In May, Pete admitted to possession of crack cocaine, heroin, cannabis and ketamine and two driving offenses. He was given the choice of rehab or jail. The choice was obvious. However, initial drug tests show Pete has made no progress in his detox program. As a result, the court has ordered Pete Doherty to prove he wants to be rehabilitated within a month or else he’ll be sent to jail.

Lachlar ordered Doherty to return to West London Magistrates’ Court for a Sept. 4 hearing. The singer left in a black minivan, poking through a sunroof to jeer at photographers as the vehicle sped away.

I haven’t been keeping count, but this is probably the twentieth time Pete has been caught with drugs and not gone to jail. The London judicial system is awesome. The prosecution could show a tape of me murdering five people and kicking a dog and the judge would say, “In light of this evidence, I sentence you to 5 years of community service.” Then everyone would gasp at the harsh sentence and the judge would have to bang his gavel and shout, “Order in the court! Order in the court!”

Update: Pete has also been banned from the streets of London.