Eminem is fat

A recent picture of Eminem from The National Enquirer was unearthed today. He’s fat. Fatty fat fat fat. Oops, sorry. Got carried away. The mag says something about him being in hiding because he’s ashamed of his body and that his weight may be to blame for his recent hospital visit.

A few years ago I was a little scared of making fun of this guy for fear he would chase me down the street with his bodyguards to beat me up. Now, I’m confident I can call him a fatass and get away with it. He’ll still have the mentality to chase me, but a few hundred feet into it, he’ll be out of breath and puking his guts out. And don’t get me started on if he runs past a Baskin Robbins. He’ll take their claim of 31 flavors as some sort of challenge.

Jesus. The National Enquirer even takes shots at him. They put a little red talking M&M next to his picture. The old Marshall Mathers would have kicked their ass. The new, hungrier Marshall Mathers wants to find that M&M and eat him.

Photo of fat Eminem [Celebitch]

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