Paris Hilton has begun filming her new reality show, Paris BFF, where people apply to be her new best friend. That’s why no one has heard from her recently. Until today. This one comes from FOX News who say Paris was spotted at a party requesting the DJ not play songs lasting more than 20 seconds because she has ADD.

ADD, of course, stands for “I’m a spoiled princess that just enjoys making people do what I want,” but Paris is an idiot and messed up the acronym. I swear, if I saw her at a club, I’d go right up to her, look her in her stupid wonky eye, the one staring at me not the one floating to the right, and say “hello, nice to meet you, I’m a big big fan,” but I would secretly be thinking about calling her a dumb retarded bitch. If I had the power of telepathy, that would be a pretty badass moment.

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