Last month at the taping of Rock of Love: Charm School Reunion, Sharon Osbourne attacked cast member Megan Hauserman. On Sunday, VH1 aired the footage. Finally. “Real” drama.

You could tell that as soon as Megan walked on stage, tension started to build. The guy host asked if Megan was drunk, but Megan shrugged it off and rhetorically asked why she would be drunk, “It’s the afternoon.” I know, right? Get a life, dude, it’s not even 4 yet.

Anyway, the altercation began when Megan started talking about her dog having her “female purse” removed so she couldn’t procreate. Sharon retorted that Megan should have the same operation. Taking a bow, Sharon added “I do not think you should be allowed to breed, my dear. I figure one of you is enough for any country.” That firecracker Megan shot back, “The only thing you’ve managed to do as a ‘celebrity’ is watch your braindead husband’s career.”

That didn’t sit too well with Sharon so she picked up a glass of wine (?) by her chair and dumped it on Megan. Then she charged at her while security broke it up.

This was planned, right? It was pretty convenient having that drink there and all I saw was Sharon rushing Megan with no real fighting. She didn’t even smash the glass and use one of the broken off shards as a knife.

Still, scripted or not, it was pretty touching for Sharon to defend her husband like that. I asked Ozzy if he was as deeply moved as I was and he said, “Mmmdhglfffnfh whrrr.” Indeed.