Charlie Sheen Would Guest Star on ‘Men’

In least surprising news of the day, Charlie Sheen says he’d be up to do a guest appearance on Two and a Half Men if they’d want him. Being broke really humbles a guy. Not that it’d happen since his character is killed off in the season premiere. Speaking with Matt Lauer on Today,

“Absolutely. If they wanted or needed it or thought that was a good idea, I’d be completely on board for that. There’s your closer. I’ll be in the final episode.”
Sheen then added: “Unless I’m really dead. There’s no body at the funeral. There’s no urn … I’m really curious about what happened to me. I’m not just looking at it just as what they’re doing forward but I’m looking at it as what I left behind and how they’re going to figure it out.” — EW

Sheen also talked about his Comedy Central roast. He doesn’t come outright and say it but it made him tear up a little inside and not in a good way.

“It was raunchy. They said to prepare yourself. I said ‘It’s just words.’ It wasn’t just words. They were very biting. If you’re going to roast a guy like me there can’t be any boundaries. I was sitting there like, ‘I volunteered for this? … Who would do that?’ But then I thought about it and it’s not an attack. It’s a celebration.”

Poor Charlie Sheen. May I remind you this is the same guy who put a knife to his ex-wife’s throat and scared a hooker bad enough that she locked herself in the bathroom until cops showed up. And take it from me, hookers don’t scare easy.