A source tells Us Weekly what really happened during Taylor Swift and Harry Styles’ vacation to the island of Virgin Gorda where they broke up. Turns out Taylor was being a jealous, overreacting girlfriend. Who would have thunk?!

The source says Harry got drunk and left Taylor on the boat for a few hours without telling her where he was going. When Harry got back, Taylor, who had been drinking a little, was “crying and furious.”

Taylor called him a dick and accused him of running around with girls while Harry denied doing anything wrong. To be fair, he’s an 18-year-old internationally famous pop star. I’m pretty sure his penis makes all his life decisions right now.

Regardless, Taylor had the bright idea of leaving him alone on the island by flying back to LA thinking he’d call and apologize. Turns out that didn’t work. Instead, he stayed and partied with people like Richard Branson. Shocking, I know. Beg your jealous girlfriend who won’t put out to take you back or party with Richard Branson who can afford all the hookers in the world. Tough decision.

Taylor started texting Harry but he probably put her number on block. As to why he didn’t call her back, “he thinks she’s too emotional.”

Nooo. That’s impossible. Taylor Swift emotional? She’s the most level-headed girl I know. You can tell from all of those songs she writes about her exes screwing her over.