Martha Stewart makes my penis tremble

Martha Stewart

By now, everyone has to be aware that the “Got Milk?” ads are a sly attempt at connecting milk with a facial. That’s why adverts depicting Hayden Panettiere, Amanda Bynes and others with a milk mustache are met with such enthusiasm.

Well, the bright minds running the milk campaign thought it would be a good idea to have Martha Stewart in one of their trademark ads. They’re jackasses. Now I have these gross images of Martha opening her mouth and saying “Ahhh,” popping into my head. Is this hell? Do you think I can stop these vile thoughts by stabbing myself in the brain with a chopstick?

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