Paris was robbed

Paris Hilton

Sources at the LAPD say Paris Hilton’s Beverly Hills home was burglarized this morning. Police report a man in a hoodie forced his way through the front door and went through her bedroom probably trying to get his Valtrex fix. Cops say $2 million in jewelery is missing along with other items.

An APB has since been put out for the robber. Residents of Beverly Hills have been told to keep an eye open for a dude with a full blown herpes breakout. Hospitals are advised to call the authorities if anyone comes in complaing about a sudden incurable STD.

  • Rev

    I wish people would at least use enough of the cheesy “they let you grab them by the pussy” to remind people he was bragging about the things gold diggers let rich guys do.

  • LegalDementia

    Obama was actually a bigger racist than Trump but the “Nobel Prize Winner” is given a free pass by the liberal media and KoolAid drinking Democrats because he was something new and had to be praised and protected because of his color. His administration was racked with corruption (IRS, State Department, DOJ, FBI, NSA, Benghazi coverup, etc.), race relations deteriorated significantly (Baltimore, Detroit, Chicago, Dallas, Travon Martin, The Beer Summit, Black Lives Matter, Al Sharpton, Jeremiah Wright, etc.) under useless Barry. He gave us Hillary Clinton, hilariously calling her “the most qualified person ever to run for POTUS!” Together they wrecked the Democratic party for years to come and created racial divisions that may never heal. So when an asshole, pseudo-journalist like Erc Karnes calls Trump a racist…you just have to laugh!

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