Last Sunday saw Sean Penn win for Best Lead Actor in Milk, Heath Ledger win for Best Supporting Actor in Dark Knight, Kate Winslet for Best Lead Actress in The Reader, Penelope Cruz for Best Supporting Actress in Vicky Cristina Barcelona and Slumdog Millionaire win for pretty much everything else.
We also found out that acting is the most important profession in America today. The level of skill required to read lines off a script is on par with being a rocket scientist.
Also discovered was that Angelina Jolie is still doesn’t look too bad. It’s like every night she sucks the youth out of Jennifer Aniston. You’d probably find closets full of shriveled up Aniston effigies if you ever looked through her house.
The Rest of the Web, Friday, 4.28.17
Sign Me Up for This Napping Fitness Class
Beyoncé Ordering Food Has Turned into a Meme
Kids Who Want to Waste Thousands of Dollars Studying a Fake ‘Game of Thrones’ Language Are in Luck
Jennifer Lawrence Is Totally Marrying Darren Aronofsky This Summer
Katy Perry’s New Song Empowers Women To Have Food Sex or Something
Ja Rule’s $12,000 Ticket Music Festival Ends in ‘Lord of the Flies’ Nightmare With Kidnapping and Mugging Rumors
Obama’s First Joke About Trump Was Perfect
Rita Ora’s Gonna Regret This Outfit One Day
It’s Kylie Jenner’s Soulless Dead Eyes…And Her Sexy Midriff!
Kendall Jenner Gets Camera Shy Which Is Really Ironic
R. Kelly Sued for Nailing Sheriff Deputy’s Wife and Giving Her Chlamydia