ESC

Kendra Wilkinson has a baby boy

E! had their cameras pointed at Kendra Wilkinson’s womb every minute of her labor and they finally got usable footage yesterday when Kendra c-sectioned out a 9 pound, 5 ounce baby boy. Holy crap, that’s almost as big as my Thanksgiving turkey. Considering she’s 5’4”, a natural birth might have ripped her apart.

They named him Hank Baskett IV and everyone from Holly Madison to Hugh Hefner is happy for them. “We’re happy and healthy and enjoying every second with little Hank,” said Kendra and Hank Baskett.

Wait, they named him Hank Baskett IV? What, this kid thinks he’s royalty? Let me ask him this, when he’s in school and the other kids are throwing him in a trash can, is he going to make believe land and pretending his subjects are carrying him to his throne? Because that’s not a bad idea. That is if the other kids can even lift his fat ass up off the ground and don’t just run around him calling him fatty while he pants and swats at the air like King Kong.

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