Steve Urkel is a woman beater

Jaleel White, Steve Urkel on Family Matters, is being investigated for beating the mother of his child, Bridget Hardy. The police report says White punched her in her breast implants as they were driving down Pacific Coast Highway two weeks ago. A baby was in the car. When they got home, White finished the beating by slapping her and pushing her into a toilet so hard that it broke the tank.

Reps for White say, “There was absolutely no battery… no abuse… and the incident never happened.” They then waved their hand in the air to complete the Jedi Mind Trick. They said Hardy is making this up to make White look bad so she can get custody of their child.

After Jaleel pushed her into the toilet, breaking the tank, he should have said, “Did I dooo thaaaat?,” in a nasally voice. It would have been a good way to break the tension. They could have had a good laugh about it and pretended it never happened. I mean, after Bridget fixed her leaking implant.

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11 years ago

It’s time for a Sonic Sez moment.

11 years ago

Wow, dat boy be ugly. He always bin annoying, but now he just uggerly.

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